Identifying your core values and living by them

Identifying Your Core Values and Living By Them: A Hilariously Honest Guide to Becoming Your Best (and Most Authentic) Self 🌟

(Lecture Hall doors swing open with a dramatic whoosh and you stride confidently to the podium, a slightly crazed glint in your eye and a coffee mug that reads "Powered by Authenticity" in hand.)

Alright, folks! Settle down, settle down! Welcome to the most potentially life-altering, possibly anxiety-inducing, and definitely not-boring lecture you’ll attend all week (unless you’re attending another one of my lectures, in which case, I’m flattered and slightly concerned).

Today, we’re diving headfirst into the murky, wonderful, and occasionally terrifying world of Core Values.

(You take a large gulp of coffee, wincing slightly.)

Yes, yes, I know. The words "core values" probably conjure up images of corporate retreats, mission statements written in Comic Sans, and that one HR guy who keeps telling you to "think outside the box" (while simultaneously enforcing strict box-shaped parking regulations).

(You roll your eyes theatrically.)

But trust me on this one. Understanding and living by your core values isn’t about corporate jargon or forced team-building exercises. It’s about understanding yourself. It’s about figuring out what makes you tick, what gets you out of bed in the morning (besides the crushing weight of bills, of course), and what truly matters to you in this fleeting, chaotic, and often ridiculous thing we call life.

Think of your core values as your personal compass. They guide you through the fog of daily decisions, help you navigate tricky situations, and ultimately point you towards a life that feels… well, right.

(You lean forward conspiratorially.)

And let’s be honest, who doesn’t want a life that feels right? Especially when the alternative is feeling like a hamster on a wheel powered by existential dread. 🐹

So, let’s get started.

Lecture Outline:

What the Heck ARE Core Values, Anyway? (Debunking the Buzzword)
Why Bother? The Undeniable Benefits of Knowing Your Core Values (Beyond the Feel-Good Fluff)
The Great Value Excavation: Unearthing Your Inner Treasure (Practical Exercises and Hilarious Examples)
Living the Value Life: Putting Your Principles into Practice (From Theory to Action, with Minimal Self-Sabotage)
When Values Collide: Navigating Ethical Dilemmas and Tough Choices (Because Life Isn’t Always Rainbows and Unicorns)
The Ever-Evolving Self: Reassessing and Refining Your Values (Because People Change, Deal With It)

1. What the Heck ARE Core Values, Anyway? (Debunking the Buzzword)

(You click to a slide with a picture of a bewildered-looking cat staring at a dictionary.)

Okay, let’s cut through the fluff. Core values are the fundamental beliefs, guiding principles, and deeply held convictions that drive your behavior and shape your decisions. They are the things that are most important to you, the things that you stand for, the things that make you, well, you.

Think of them as your personal operating system. They dictate how you process information, react to situations, and interact with the world around you.

Here’s a simple definition:

Core Values: The principles that guide your thoughts, words, and actions, contributing to your sense of purpose and fulfillment.

(You write this on the whiteboard with dramatic flair.)

Now, let’s bust some common misconceptions:

Core values are NOT:
- Aspirational values: Things you wish were important to you (e.g., "being a morning person" when you’re secretly a nocturnal creature).
- Societal expectations: Values imposed on you by your family, friends, or culture (e.g., "getting married by 30" if you’re perfectly happy being a free spirit).
- Trendy buzzwords: "Synergy," "disruption," "blockchain" (unless you’re genuinely passionate about those things, in which case, carry on).
Core values ARE:
- Authentic: They reflect your true self, not the person you think you should be.
- Intrinsic: They come from within, not from external pressure.
- Enduring: They remain relatively stable over time, even as your circumstances change.

Example:

Let’s say you value honesty. This means you strive to be truthful in your interactions, even when it’s difficult. You prioritize transparency, integrity, and trustworthiness in your relationships. You might even call out your friend for exaggerating their weekend adventures, earning you the coveted title of "Buzzkill" (but secretly, they appreciate your honesty).

(You wink.)

2. Why Bother? The Undeniable Benefits of Knowing Your Core Values (Beyond the Feel-Good Fluff)

(You click to a slide with a picture of a superhero cape billowing in the wind.)

Alright, so knowing what your core values are is nice and all, but what’s the actual point? Why should you spend your precious time contemplating your inner self when you could be binge-watching cat videos on YouTube? (Don’t worry, I understand the temptation.)

Here’s why:

Improved Decision-Making: When faced with a tough choice, your core values can act as a tiebreaker. They help you align your decisions with what truly matters to you, leading to greater satisfaction and less regret.
- Example: If you value creativity and you’re offered a stable, high-paying job that involves repetitive tasks, you might choose to take a lower-paying job that allows you to express your artistic talents, even if it’s a bit riskier.
Stronger Relationships: When you’re clear about your values, you can attract people who share those values. This leads to deeper, more meaningful connections built on mutual respect and understanding.
- Example: If you value compassion, you’ll likely be drawn to people who are empathetic and actively involved in helping others. You’ll probably also avoid people who kick puppies (because, seriously, who does that?!).
Increased Self-Awareness: Understanding your core values helps you understand yourself better. You’ll gain insights into your motivations, your strengths, and your weaknesses.
- Example: If you value learning, you’ll understand why you’re constantly seeking new information and experiences. You’ll also understand why you get twitchy when you’re stuck in a boring meeting.
Enhanced Sense of Purpose: Living in alignment with your core values gives you a sense of purpose and meaning in life. You’ll feel more fulfilled and energized, knowing that you’re living authentically and making a positive impact on the world (even if it’s just by being a decent human being).
- Example: If you value environmental sustainability, you might choose to reduce your carbon footprint, support eco-friendly businesses, and advocate for environmental protection. This will give you a sense of purpose and contribute to a healthier planet (which, let’s face it, we desperately need).
Reduced Stress and Anxiety: When you’re living in alignment with your values, you’re less likely to feel stressed, anxious, or conflicted. You’ll be more resilient to challenges and better equipped to handle difficult situations.
- Example: If you value family, you’ll prioritize spending time with your loved ones, even when you’re busy. This will help you maintain strong relationships and reduce feelings of guilt and regret.

(You pause for dramatic effect.)

Basically, knowing your core values is like having a superpower. It allows you to navigate life with greater clarity, confidence, and authenticity. And who doesn’t want a superpower?

3. The Great Value Excavation: Unearthing Your Inner Treasure (Practical Exercises and Hilarious Examples)

(You click to a slide with a picture of an archaeologist brushing dirt off a priceless artifact.)

Okay, now for the fun part! It’s time to put on your Indiana Jones hat and embark on a quest to discover your own core values. Don’t worry, you won’t need a whip or a fedora (although, if you have a fedora, I’m not judging).

Here are some practical exercises to help you unearth your inner treasure:

Exercise 1: The Value Brainstorm

Grab a pen and paper (or your favorite digital note-taking app).
Brainstorm a list of values that resonate with you. Don’t overthink it. Just write down anything that comes to mind.
- Here are some examples to get you started:
  - Adventure
  - Authenticity
  - Balance
  - Community
  - Compassion
  - Creativity
  - Curiosity
  - Excellence
  - Faith
  - Family
  - Freedom
  - Gratitude
  - Honesty
  - Humor
  - Integrity
  - Justice
  - Kindness
  - Knowledge
  - Leadership
  - Learning
  - Loyalty
  - Optimism
  - Peace
  - Resilience
  - Respect
  - Responsibility
  - Security
  - Service
  - Spirituality
  - Teamwork
  - Trust
Don’t worry about being "right" or "wrong." Just write down what feels authentic to you.
Aim for a list of at least 20-30 values.

Exercise 2: The Elimination Round

Review your list of values.
One by one, ask yourself: "If I had to choose between this value and another value on my list, which would I choose?"
Cross out the values that are less important to you.
Keep repeating this process until you have narrowed down your list to 5-7 core values.

(You dramatically cross your arms and glare at the audience.)

This is the hard part, folks. It’s like choosing your favorite child (don’t tell your kids I said that). But trust me, it’s worth it.

Exercise 3: The "Why" Deep Dive

For each of your remaining core values, ask yourself: "Why is this value important to me?"
Keep asking "why" until you get to the root of the value.
- Example:
  - Value: Honesty
  - Why? Because I believe in being truthful.
  - Why? Because I want to build trust with others.
  - Why? Because I believe that strong relationships are built on trust and transparency.
  - Root Value: Authenticity and Connection
This will help you gain a deeper understanding of your values and their significance in your life.

Exercise 4: The Life Story Review

Reflect on significant moments in your life: both positive and negative.
Ask yourself: "What values were at play in this situation?"
- Example:
  - Situation: You volunteered at a homeless shelter.
  - Values at Play: Compassion, Service, Community
  - Situation: You quit a job that was making you miserable.
  - Values at Play: Freedom, Authenticity, Well-being
This will help you identify the values that have consistently guided your behavior throughout your life.

(You grin mischievously.)

And now, for some hilarious (and hopefully relatable) examples of core values in action:

Scenario: Your friend asks you to help them move on a Saturday morning.
- If you value:
  - Loyalty: You’ll grit your teeth, chug some coffee, and help them move, even though you’d rather be sleeping.
  - Freedom: You’ll politely decline, citing a prior engagement (even if that engagement is binge-watching Netflix in your pajamas).
  - Efficiency: You’ll hire movers for them and then take them out for pizza (killing two birds with one stone).
Scenario: Your boss asks you to work late on a Friday night to finish a project.
- If you value:
  - Excellence: You’ll stay late and make sure the project is perfect, even if it means sacrificing your social life.
  - Balance: You’ll politely explain that you have prior commitments and offer to finish the project first thing Monday morning.
  - Humor: You’ll tell your boss a hilarious (but appropriate) joke about working late and then subtly slip out the door.

(You raise an eyebrow.)

See? Core values are everywhere! They’re influencing your decisions every single day, whether you realize it or not.

4. Living the Value Life: Putting Your Principles into Practice (From Theory to Action, with Minimal Self-Sabotage)

(You click to a slide with a picture of someone confidently walking a tightrope.)

Okay, you’ve identified your core values. Congratulations! Now what? Well, the real challenge begins: living in alignment with those values.

(You sigh dramatically.)

This isn’t always easy. Life is messy, complicated, and full of temptations to stray from your principles. But trust me, it’s worth the effort.

Here are some tips for putting your values into practice:

Integrate your values into your daily routine.
- Example: If you value health, make time for exercise, eat nutritious meals, and prioritize sleep.
- Example: If you value learning, read books, listen to podcasts, or take online courses.
Use your values as a filter for decision-making.
- Before making a decision, ask yourself: "Does this align with my core values?"
- If the answer is no, reconsider your options.
Communicate your values to others.
- Let your friends, family, and colleagues know what’s important to you.
- This will help them understand your motivations and respect your boundaries.
Surround yourself with people who share your values.
- Seek out relationships with people who support and encourage your personal growth.
- Avoid people who consistently undermine your values or make you feel bad about yourself.
Be mindful of your words and actions.
- Make sure your words and actions are consistent with your values.
- If you say you value honesty, be honest in your interactions.
- If you say you value compassion, show compassion to others.
Forgive yourself when you slip up.
- Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes.
- Don’t beat yourself up when you deviate from your values.
- Learn from your mistakes and try to do better next time.

(You pause for a moment of self-reflection.)

I’m not going to lie, living a value-driven life is a constant work in progress. There will be times when you fail, when you fall short, when you question everything you thought you knew. But that’s okay. It’s part of the human experience.

The important thing is to keep striving to live authentically and to align your life with what truly matters to you.

5. When Values Collide: Navigating Ethical Dilemmas and Tough Choices (Because Life Isn’t Always Rainbows and Unicorns)

(You click to a slide with a picture of two cars speeding towards each other.)

So, what happens when your core values clash? What happens when you’re faced with a difficult decision that pits one value against another?

(You shrug dramatically.)

Welcome to the real world, folks! This is where things get tricky.

Here are some strategies for navigating value conflicts:

Identify the conflicting values.
- Clearly define the values that are at odds with each other.
Prioritize your values.
- Determine which value is most important to you in this particular situation.
- This may require some soul-searching and honest self-reflection.
Look for creative solutions.
- Try to find a solution that honors both values, even if it requires some compromise.
Seek guidance from trusted sources.
- Talk to a friend, family member, mentor, or therapist for advice and support.
Accept that there may be no perfect solution.
- Sometimes, you have to make a difficult choice that involves sacrificing one value for another.
- Be kind to yourself and remember that you’re doing the best you can.

Example:

Let’s say you value honesty and loyalty. Your best friend is dating someone who you know is cheating on them. Do you tell your friend the truth, even if it hurts them and potentially damages your friendship? Or do you remain loyal to your friend and keep their secret?

(You scratch your head thoughtfully.)

This is a tough one! There’s no easy answer. Ultimately, you’ll have to weigh the importance of honesty and loyalty in this particular situation and make a decision that you can live with.

6. The Ever-Evolving Self: Reassessing and Refining Your Values (Because People Change, Deal With It)

(You click to a slide with a picture of a butterfly emerging from a chrysalis.)

Finally, remember that your core values are not set in stone. They can evolve and change over time as you grow and learn.

(You nod sagely.)

It’s important to periodically reassess your values to ensure that they still reflect your true self.

Here are some signs that it might be time to reassess your values:

You feel disconnected from your life.
You’re making decisions that don’t feel right.
You’re experiencing a major life change (e.g., a new job, a new relationship, a new city).
You’re feeling unfulfilled or dissatisfied with your current path.

(You smile encouragingly.)

Don’t be afraid to let go of values that no longer serve you and embrace new values that align with your evolving self. This is a natural part of the process.

(You take a final sip of coffee, feeling a surge of authenticity.)

And that, my friends, concludes our lecture on identifying and living by your core values! I hope you found it informative, entertaining, and perhaps even a little bit life-changing.

(You bow theatrically.)

Now go forth and live authentically! And remember, if you ever feel lost or confused, just ask yourself: "What would my core values do?"

(You exit the stage to thunderous applause, leaving behind a room full of enlightened individuals ready to conquer the world with their newfound self-awareness. Or, at the very least, to make slightly better decisions about what to order for lunch.)